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Category Archives: Crappy Movies
Extreme Prejudice (Review)
Two young boys grew up in a US/Mexico border town. One embraced law and order and became the town’s tough-but-fair sheriff Jack (Nick Nolte). The other was Cash (Powers Boothe), who chased fast money and power and became a drug … Continue reading
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The Keep (Review)
I only wish I could tell you what this is all about. Set in Nazi occupied Romania in World War 2, The Keep is an imposing stone structure that instantly catches the eye of the invading Nazi troops, both as … Continue reading
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Incarnate (Review)
It’s a premise that demands a swiftly cancelled TV show; Dr Ember (Aaron Eckhart) is a wheelchair bound non-denominational exorcist who – with jaws firmly clenched – leads a small team of alterna-types as they rid various unfortunates of their unwanted … Continue reading
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Now You See Me 2 (Review)
It has only been a couple years since Now You See Me was released, and like the title inadvertently suggested the film had already departed my memory banks. So a quick, spoiler free, reminder; four magicians with various specialties joined … Continue reading
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Underworld 5: Blood Wars (Review)
You know the awkward moments when someone takes a joke that wasn’t funny in the first place, way too far? The Underworld franchise was never meant to be funny – and its wilful absence of humour is an issue in itself … Continue reading
Posted in Crappy Movies, Film, Movie Reviews, The 7th Level of Suck
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The Vigilante Diaries (Review)
Ok here’s how dumb this film is; the title is ‘The Vigilante Diaries’, and the film is broken down into chapters that the filmmakers helpfully label as ‘journal entries’. … Wait, shouldn’t they be ‘diary ent-?…’ Ah forget it. The … Continue reading
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Hush (Review)
Disclaimer: I loathe films like these that peddle purpose-free nastiness. Maddie is a deaf-mute, single woman who is soon to finish her first novel. If only she can decide upon the appropriate ending. She lives alone in a secluded forest … Continue reading
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Showtime (Review)
Mitch (Robert de Niro) is a police ‘lifer’, a dedicated no frills detective who gets things done. As Mitch himself would say ‘it isn’t about sliding over car bonnets or firing two guns at once. It is about thorough analysis … Continue reading
Pride and Prejudice and Zombies (Review)
Now that the unpleasantness of the zombie outbreak is contained to more impoverished areas, we 16th century English men and women can return to supping tea and being overly polite to each other. Somehow despite that ridiculous set up this … Continue reading
Posted in Crappy Movies, Film, Movie Reviews, The 7th Level of Suck
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Boomerang (Review)
The 80s showed us Eddie Murphy could not funny (and how). Interviews from the time showed that he could do smooth. It wasn’t until Boomerang that anyone wondered if he could do romantic. They wouldn’t experiment again. Boasting a Trumpy … Continue reading
Posted in Crappy Movies, Eddie Murphy, Film, Movie Reviews, Superstars
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