Weekend at Bernies 1 & 2 (Review)

Can I just state upfront that Weekend at Bernies is indeed an annoying one note 80s comedy with precious few laughs and even less substance, but while I fully acknowledge its many failings I distinctly recall enjoying it more than Teen Wolf.

There. I said it. In my opinion if W@B traded for the perpetually likable Michael J Fox it would be Teen Wolf that would forever stand as the punchline to a thousand jokes and not this film. But facts is facts, and unfortunately while both stink one is looked upon with far more inexplicable fondness.

And it ain’t the flick with the dead guy getting smacked in the nuts.

Weekend at Bernies

Workaday schmos Richard and Larry are (sorta) working (kinda) hard at (not) climbing the corporate ladder (one bit). Until that is they luck onto an accounting error that seemingly points to internal fraud involving millions… 80s millions.

They take their Xeroxed pages direct to the top rung to excitedly espouse their theory to the head honcho.

Bernie Lomax.

Bernie is extremely interested in the apparent shonky business, and promptly invites the duo to his plush and swanky island getaway that very weekend to examine the documents more thoroughly.

Unfortunately unbeknownst to the doofy duo Bernie also sits atop the upper rung of the swindle, and he has already decided that it would be better for he and his cronies if this issue was buried quick smart – along with Richard and Larry. Bernie conspires with his nefarious associates and it is agreed that the ‘clean up’ will occur at Bernie’s pad over the weekend.

Or so Bernie thinks.

Just a hop, skip and a backstab later and Richard and Larry show up at Bernie’s luxurious pad to find Bernie already stiff, cold, inanimate. Dead

Isn’t this getting complicated? Don’t worry, as Bernie’s pulse expires, so too does all the creativity in the film.

With Bernie dead and the weekend just started, the lads decide why ruin a potential party? Especially when it seems that even in death Bernie remains the life of the party. Forms can be filled in and reports filed just after the festivities cease.

For the final hour Bernie’s corpse is hit and hit on, he does business deals, is shot and strangled and variously mistreated – all in the name of low rent ‘hilarity’ – with Richard and Larry playing chaperone.

Did I forget to mention he even skis!?!

None of this is even a mite amusing to anyone sober or over 20, not now when a body getting carted around and smacked in the balls repeatedly is so passé and trite that they wouldn’t even make a reality show about it. But nonetheless it exists, unlike so very many 80s movies.

Final Rating – 5 / 10. Bernie is surprisingly supple and limber for a guy dead for 48 hours, but if you thought he was unexpectedly active before, you haven’t heard nothing yet.

Weekend at Bernies 2

It’s more than likely that no-one thought Weekend at Bernies would be that successful, but after it turned out to be a surprise minor hit a quick crappy cash-in sequel was inevitable. Weekend at Bernies 2 clocks in at a heavily padded 85 minutes, with extended animated intros and outros accounting for a chunk of that.

But despite the fact that it is an unnecessary sequel to a film about a corpse being mistreated the sequel is a far greater film than the original. But let me clarify that by stating clearly that the film still sucks, it’s just better than the first.

Bernie 2 takes up immediately after the shenanigans of the first films, while Richard and Larry are filling in forms and filing reports (you can’t avoid it no matter how hard you try).

To set the scene bad guys want the money that Bernie embezzled and hid, Bernie’s former company wants it too and thinks that Richard and Larry have it. They don’t, but shortly after they finish with police they find a clue that sends them to the West Indies with dreams of hidden treasure.

But isn’t Bernie still dead? Yes he sure is, but here’s the rub;

Thanks to a voodoo priestess and a botched ritual Bernie is re-animated, only with limited abilities, namely the ability to boogie until the cows come home – but only when calypso music is playing…only Zomb(ern)ie knows where the cash is, and somehow he is driven to dance his way to the site.

Frankly I can’t think how this could not be fun from here.

This time Bernie leads an impromptu conga line (and picks up!), goes parasailing and is attacked by a shark while several gormless idiots fumble, fawn and flirt cluelessly about, handing the body around like a smelly cold potato.

The amazing thing is that even while dead the man manages to do more and enjoy life more than practically all of the living. And even Dead Bernie shows more acting ability and care than a very much alive Nicolas Cage…

Final Rating – 6 / 10. It’s still overall an ordinary effort, but on this occasion they knew full well they were playing with house money thanks to the first film. When that happens why not go to the Caribbean and bash out a lazy sequel? It’s that lack of care that shows in the end product, only it manages to make proceedings a little more fun.

About OGR

While I try to throw a joke or two into proceedings when I can all of the opinions presented in my reviews are genuine. I don't expect that all will agree with my thoughts at all times nor would it be any fun if you did, so don't be shy in telling me where you think I went wrong... and hopefully if you think I got it right for once. Don't be shy, half the fun is in the conversation after the movie.
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