If you’re a male and aged 13 to 40 and you chanced upon this review using google search let me help: press ‘back’ then click ‘images’ at the top of the page (I know I had to exercise much restraint looking for the pics in this review – it might be the first review on this site with more pics than words).
Always remember to floss kids.
You might want to fine tune your search too by typing ‘alba ass’.
Allow me to help further by informing you that when the ticker passes 20 minutes screentime the best part has already elapsed, the rest is a film about a treasure hunt and a lost drug shipment.
In case one person out there expects more let me summarise:
Into the Blue features pretty people performing jobs that only pretty people get who dive the pretty waters off a pretty island where they find a pretty big – and unexpected – score while looking for pretty treasure.
Look! Underwater treasure.
Paul Walker and Jessica Alba play the pretty couple on the poster, another couple dipshits roll up just in time to fuck everything up for everyone, ensuring naughty drug dealers get involved and allowing a scene in which Paul Walker’s character can apparently hold his breath for about a quarter hour.
Final Rating – 6 / 10. The film features bikinis, drugs, sharks, treasure, bikinis and gorgeous backdrops. But mostly bikinis. Oh and Josh Brolin slums it for a paid holiday to work on his tan as a boat owner.
Do I really need a reason any more?
In truth this film is about as good as you could expect something like this might be.
