“Hello. No I won’t shave the moustache.”
If I might paraphrase Prince here for a second: “I was drinking when I watched this, so ‘scuse me if this goes astray.”
OK, thish ish an 80’sh thriller shtarring William Hurt and Kathleen Turner.
Set during a heatwave, Bill is Ned, a lawyer (with a bad moustache) who meets local housefrau Kathleen Turner. Aaaahhhh Kathy Turner! As hot as Kathleen Turner in her prime was, it was always inevitable that she would pile on the pounds eventually, just as it will eventually happen with Beyonce. Mark my words, at 40 she will look like Aretha Franklin and Kirsty Alley, and while it makes me sad to know that it is simply the cost of sensational curves in their youth.
Anyway Ned chats her up, and after a little chasey chasey they start what others might call a “torrid affair”, I might say that he starts nailing her frequently.
Kathleen tells him that she is married to a local wealthy businessman, who she describes as a corrupt wanker, and over the following weeks their idle chat regarding him turns more ominous, as they discuss how much better they would have it if he was dead.
When the husband returns home for the weekend, he brings with him his niece, who springs Ned and Kathy mid session and runs off. Ned then consults a kid that he saved from prison as to how best to kill the husband so it appears accidental. The kid is played by a young Mickey Rourke, who sounds very much like he is 12, a far cry from the broken down man that feels up chicks in public nowadays.
To save time, the husband does indeed buy the farm, though not altogether as planned, and the ensuing days see Ned as a suspect, not surprisingly he gets a little paranoid, as two of the guys unknowingly trying to nail him are a fellow lawyer and a police investigator, both his friends.
The evidence builds until a coincidental meeting changes Ned’s worldview somewhat, and it all becomes clear shortly after, to him and us.
There is a big difference between ancient caveman rock paintings and say Michelangelo, just as no-one would bother pitting an abacus against a supercomputer. I feel the same way about early horror movies like Halloween, it is still effective in its own way but I would hardly call it an amazing piece of cinema if it were made today, given the number of movies released since.
I think of Body Heat in the same way, it may have been effective when released but I have seen so many twist movies in the last several years that in this one I saw the ending coming from the first 25 minutes, so when it arrived I was more disappointed that I was right than impressed.
Final Rating – 6.5 / 10. I’ve seen worse, but now that I have seen this movie I can think of no reason that would make me wanna see it again.
