Lake Placid 2 (Review)

Don't eat that hand, it's yellow.

Don’t eat that hand, it’s yellow.

We’ve been over this again and again. If you want to green light a sequel that has no plans beyond replicating the first film, there are some very basic requirements.

At least aim to provide some:

  1. Laughs
  2. Gasps
  3. Memorable characters
  4. Memorable kills

And failing that, some random nudity never hurts.

The original Lake Placid ticked boxes one through four, and so convincingly that even the most red blooded, blue balled male didn’t see the lack of boobies as a failing.

The only laughs from Lake Placid 2 are how very unnecessary it seems. The gasps come upon seeing what passes for a ‘crocodile’, and more laughs I guess when you think that this had less of a special effects ‘budget’ than an ‘allowance’ – such is the cheapness of the effects. They even CGI’d in a seaplane which should be moored near the campsite, only it appears and disappears in subsequent scenes. The characters are uniformly bland despite attempts to render them as replicas of those in LP 1, but a surfer looking cop, a spunky environmental protection lady and an apparently Scottish big game hunter are doing it for anyone.

And the only memorable kill is the crime that this film commits upon what could have been a franchise.

But it does have boobs. No reason boobs. Six or so of them. So… partial credit.

Final Rating – 4.5 / 10. This is either Lake Vapid or Lake Flaccid. Astonishing that on the back of this film a third film was approved. Unfathomable that it is actually worse than this.

About OGR

While I try to throw a joke or two into proceedings when I can all of the opinions presented in my reviews are genuine. I don't expect that all will agree with my thoughts at all times nor would it be any fun if you did, so don't be shy in telling me where you think I went wrong... and hopefully if you think I got it right for once. Don't be shy, half the fun is in the conversation after the movie.
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