Ted 2 (Review)

ted_two_ver5Oh Ted you hilarious swearing bear. One would have thought that your initial adventures were sufficient to arm gelled up frat-boys with saucy quotes and Family Guy devotees with arguments as to whether he is merely a combination of Brian the dog and Peter Griffin.
But no! You’re back. For two more hours…

The plot; Ted is married to the check out chick. Two years into matrimony and the bliss has evaporated. It is decided that a child will fix all. With Ted as a dad at least the new kid will instantly have something to play with.

But in trying for a child, the authorities – who astonishingly never noticed before – decide that Ted, being a teddy bear, should be denied human rights like access to IVF, employment and the benefits of marriage.

Many years ago I started a Family Guy Bingo game. You could begin any episode and count on the usual taboo topics being raised as fodder for increasingly lazy jokes, with the ‘oh gee!’ fooling viewers into thinking they just laughed. Incest. Rape. Aids. So many race jokes. More rape. It was like shooting fish in a barrel for Family Guy.

Thankfully there’s a bit less of that on display here, but the first time Ted compares his plight to the struggle of black slaves in America, I cringed. So we’re going there huh? It’s bad enough in a quick five second cutaway, two hours is a long road to hoe.

In this film Ted and John (Mark Wahlberg) take turns being Peter Griffin, with Amanda Syfried at their side as an inexperienced lawyer tasked with ‘humanising’ Ted.

I hate to say it but my laughs often came at the expense of others, the constant jabs at the size of Syfried’s eyes, Ted’s decision to name himself Ted Clubber-Lang. It’s all quite silly and a patent re-release of Ted 1, only with more blatant and lazy Family Guy cutaways and more cameos.

Depending on your viewpoint Ted may or may not be human, regardless of the verdict though, it’s fair to say that he isn’t the compelling ‘person’ Seth MacFarlane clearly thinks he is.

…or maybe he likes the sound of folding money…

Final Rating – 6 / 10. The bear that magically came into existence, has now ungracefully commenced his transition to non-existence.

About OGR

While I try to throw a joke or two into proceedings when I can all of the opinions presented in my reviews are genuine. I don't expect that all will agree with my thoughts at all times nor would it be any fun if you did, so don't be shy in telling me where you think I went wrong... and hopefully if you think I got it right for once. Don't be shy, half the fun is in the conversation after the movie.
This entry was posted in Film, Movie Reviews, The Grey Area. Bookmark the permalink.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.