The inoffensive alt rock over similarly nothing credits should have been a warning. I wish I read the signs better…
So serious Lego-Hair and Broken Scar-Jo are an item. They are friends with street smart Token Black Athlete and sassy Indian Barbie, and all go away for a weekend of debauchery and shenanigans at Douche Timberlake and Young Alicia Silverstone-alike’s country home outside New Orleans.
There is a montage of the six pack full of stupid’s antics, and a building sense of foreboding pain for the viewer. Then the phone rings…
“Terrorists are attacking. Stay indoors. Go nowhere.”
Of course such a call brings many emotions and knee jerk reactions. Should we leave? Stay? Punch Douche Timberlake? (Please can we punch Douche Timberlake?) Like the film itself none of the characters can come up with a compelling reason to do anything, so they argue and make noise and muddle about a bit. Then undeniable proof that the call wasn’t a hoax flies overhead. And boom goes New Orleans.
When the zombies finally rock up they are indeed the running kind, in fact in this case I would wager that zombieism seems to have amplified the athletic abilities of the formerly living. These zombies run fast, climb well and jump high, not that it does much good. For all their efforts there is negligible blood, no gore and the ‘kills’ are uniformly dull and disappointing.
In fact for the most part the film’s action consists of people and zombies leaping onto and off of, moving cars. Often at the same time. It’s a sad day when the guys making zombie films aren’t budding gore-hounds and disgusting effects aficionados, but a few stunt guys and gals looking for a screen credit.
There are so many zombie movies emerging every year that I often wonder why they bother listing a script-writer for films like this. The Demented was less written than it was lifted from 87 other zombie films, only for the most part they could only replicate the boring filler bits between the zombie assaults.
And if you look forward to those bits, then The Demented is the film for you.
Final Rating – 5.5 / 10. Perhaps I was the most Demented in even momentarily allowing myself to think this might prove interesting.
