Category Archives: Crappy Movies

Precious Cargo (Review)

Posted on January 6, 2017 by OGR

I watched this only for Bruce Willis. Bruce is Marcellus Wallace now. An older gentleman who directs others, remaining removed from the hurly burly. In this dire effort Bruce is Eddie, a crime boss keeping a couple wet behind the … Continue reading →

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The Mechanic 2 (Review)

Posted on December 30, 2016 by OGR

With sequels to low budget unexpected successes – even modest ones – there are two ways to go; you can continue full throttle with a bigger budget and hopefully snag a big name co-star to go alongside the headliner from … Continue reading →

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Corky Romano (Review)

Posted on December 27, 2016 by OGR

While trawling the IMDb trivia in a desperate attempt to distract myself from the unfunniness onscreen, I was not at all surprised to learn that Corky Romano was written, produced and filmed in a matter of months to avoid the … Continue reading →

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Home Alone (Review)

Posted on December 25, 2016 by OGR

I never noticed as a youth but Kevin (Macauley Culkin) is an obnoxious ill mannered child in an entirely obnoxious and ill mannered family. Even the extended family of cousins, aunts and uncles are uniformly vile. So it is understandably … Continue reading →

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The Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning (Review)

Posted on December 13, 2016 by OGR

The problem with films featuring one dimensional mindless killing machines is that there are only so many ways to skin a cat – or a teenager. Jaws found this. Slasher films suffer from this. The Expendables will learn one day. … Continue reading →

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Warcraft (Review)

Posted on December 9, 2016 by OGR

Orcs. They’re just like us. They live. They love. They joke. They war. So much war. With other orcs. With humans. With some… magical humans. There is every chance that I missed some vital exposition early on in Warcraft – … Continue reading →

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Sausage Party (Review)

Posted on November 18, 2016 by OGR

Seth Rogen: Hey *cough* pass that here man. Inhale. Joonowot? Jonah Hill: Huh? Rogen: I said, duyouknowhat? Hill: K. … What? Rogen: What? Oh yeah. You know how we get stoned and watch cartoons? Hill: Yep. Rogen: Do you know … Continue reading →

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The Loft (Review)

Posted on November 17, 2016 by OGR

The Loft is a jointly owned, well appointed Love Shack, that five guys with deep pockets and shallow morals use to cheat on their respective partners. A text system warns the other four gents to ‘not come a knockin’ at … Continue reading →

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Ghostbusters 2016 (Review)

Posted on November 11, 2016 by OGR

Non-believer Erin (Kristen Wiig) joins believers Abby (Melissa McCarthy) and Julian (Kate McKinnon), and streetwise Patty (Leslie Jones) to form a current day foursome dedicated to bustin’ all things paranormal. Obviously the plot is new (not really) but this remake … Continue reading →

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Independence Day: Resurgence 2016 (Review)

Posted on November 4, 2016 by OGR

Because Independence Day in 1996 was a thing, the world continued on that differing timeline until the present day. We already have a female president of the United States, the world has continued to interact peacefully, and technology is far … Continue reading →

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